Thriving through IVF – In 2014, newlywed Katie Gow was struggling to see how she could possibly start the married life she dreamed of – including having children of her own – whilst her emetophobia (a debilitating phobia of sickness/vomit) was having such a large impact on her life. How on earth would she cope with morning sickness, or her own children being poorly, if she was still living with this phobia?
She then took the decision to go through The Thrive Programme and soon overcame her emetophobia for good, then training to be a Thrive Programme Coach® herself too. However, the mental skills she learned through the programme proved more important than she ever knew as she and her husband began the long journey to having their own children. In this blog, Katie talks through her IVF journey, and just how much thriving has helped her through it all!
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“I’m sitting writing this today looking at my baby boy asleep in his moses basket. Not only was it a challenging road to conceive him, but it was also a huge challenge to deliver him.
In 2014 I married my husband. We always knew we’d like to have a baby but back then I was still emetophobic and although we were trying I was also terrified at the same time. If I fell pregnant I’d have to deal with morning sickness and I’d have to deal with a sick child one day. My desire to be a mother always out weighed my fear though and we kept trying. After a year of nothing happening and of letting myself get so stressed out about it, we started investigations into what might be stopping us. This consisted of some blood tests. I’d always had two crippling fears, sickness and needles. I only managed to get the tests done by lying on the nurses bed shaking and staring at the wall.
One evening I was feeling so sick, I’d caught some sort of stomach bug and as I was pacing about panicking and working myself up into a frenzy I desperately googled for help when The Thrive Programme popped up. Having nothing to lose I ordered it. I worked so hard to complete The Programme that it gave me the confidence to continue with the fertility investigations. (You can view my original testimonial video here).
It’s just as well because I ended up having to have weekly blood tests done once I started medication treatment – a proud moment as the side effects were nausea! I would never have touched any medications with that side effect before. As the months passed and still no further forward, I was offered to do injections for a few months whilst I was placed on the IVF waiting list. I thought, this is a good opportunity to give self-injections a go. If I do have to go down the IVF route I’d be well practiced. The techniques I learned from doing The Thrive Programme really helped me beat my fear of needles. Eventually after doing daily injections I was used to it, and I was proud each and every time I did it.
Infertility can be a very lonely place. Especially if you have no one to talk to about it. The Thrive Programme also helped me feel more confident in social situations and therefore I felt able to attend a support group and meet some ladies going through IVF. I’d never have been brave enough to do that before either.
When it became time to start IVF I was able to use all the skills and confidence to cope with each and every stage of the roller-coaster ride that it was, from the daily injections, to the operation and all the emotional elements too. Unfortunately the first transfer didn’t work, like it doesn’t for so many couples. It was a grieving process and I had to find a way to pick myself back up for the next try in a few months time. I had hit a low point but I had to make the decision to throw myself in and give myself the best shot second time round. I really put everything into creating a better mindset but also learning to let go of control in the end.
I couldn’t believe it when I finally got the positive pregnancy test I had always hoped for. The pregnancy journey had began. Again, I used everything I’d learnt to keep thriving through the pregnancy. I did feel sick but I coped very well with it and continued to go to my work and even commuting on the bus. Something else I never thought I’d be able to do. I thoroughly enjoyed being pregnant, despite the unpleasant side effects of which there were a few!
“If someone had told me before The Thrive Programme that that’s what it would have taken to be a mother I’d have walked the other way. I am forever grateful for everything that doing The Thrive Programme has allowed me to do”
At 31 weeks and 6 days a routine midwife appointment revealed I had developed severe onset preeclampsia (a blood pressure disorder relating to pregnancy). I was rushed to hospital where I was hooked up to various wires and drips to be told that our baby was going to have to be born that very day by emergency c section. Looking back on it this was the ultimate challenge. I had to cope with nausea, medical procedures and the emotions of having an 8 week premature baby in the neonatal unit. I’m not going to lie, it was a very tough experience but I dealt with it all really well considering, and actually the medical procedures didn’t phase me at all.
I could never have imagined being able to do and achieve everything that I’ve been through to have my son. If someone had told me before The Thrive Programme that that’s what it would have taken to be a mother I’d have walked the other way. I am forever grateful for everything that doing The Thrive Programme has allowed me to do. It is also why I enjoy being a Thrive Programme Coach® myself now. Helping and encouraging people to get the best from their minds and their lives.”
Katie Gow is a Licensed Thrive Programme Coach® based in Edinburgh, Scotland, and sees clients both locally and online for those further away. Thriving through IVF
